As you have already gone through how much co-leading is effective for couples to make their marriage life a success. We have figured out six integrating elements which are really helpful for you to co-lead your relationship.
1. Raise your emotional intelligence.
As per the past traditions, there were certain traits defined for both men and women and on the basis of these, they were judged. Say, men were considered to be strong and reasonable. And if they express their emotions, they were considered to be weak as it was a feminine trait. On the other hand, women were expected to carry the emotional burden of a relationship.
But in today’s co-leading relationship, both men and women are supposed to talk, express their emotions and equally initiate emotional connections. In a co-leading relationship, both the partners get a chance to learn to express themselves fully and to communicate with each other logically and emotionally. As a result, a balanced, integrated and a strong relationship discovers where both partners get the equal status of sharing their emotional and logical bond.
2. Fun Titles should be assigned to roles.
The daily household tasks such as washing the dishes, handling the finances, and cooking dinner should be finished just like some fun activity. The person handling certain roles can be given a fun title which makes your task even more enjoyable. This could be done by creating fun titles for those who complete those tasks. Life is not only limited to check off the to-do list but life is all about how to create every task and moment enjoyable which can be remembered for a lifetime.
3. A family meeting is important.
In a relationship or as in your complete life, satisfaction can only be achieved when the partners are together in terms of goal setting, achieving and celebrating. The goals should flourish keeping in view the happiness of both, and not through the sacrifice done by any one of the partners. Mental, physical, spiritual, familial, financial, social, sexual, and professional - these are eight aspects which every relationship should focus upon. In order to make a relationship work, the key aspect is to understand the satisfaction level. Based on the satisfaction level only, the desired goals and intentions can be set. And meeting together weekly as discussing these points let you work upon the needs on which you have to work.
4. Roles should be delegated.
There are certain roles which are specifically been assigned to partners based on their gender and they get themselves overburdened to perform these roles. There is no point wasting your time in doing it all. Society sees the wife as a mother, lover, counselor, professional, cook, maid, accountant, and party planner to her husband and children and a husband as a father, husband, accountant, handyman, landscaper, and chauffeur to his wife and children. But your focus should not live as per the society norms. Rather living life on mutual terms, performing together the household roles, keeping each other’s strengths, weaknesses, schedules, and affinities in consideration will make your relationship stronger.
5. The decision should be based on each other’s trust.
When it comes to decision making in a co-leading relationship, the decisions are empowered on the basis of couple goals. That’s why if agreeing on certain roles in advance is considered to be good. This sanctions the right to both partners to make decisions that are in favor of their relationship along with developing trust in their partner to also take decisions.
If one partner is okay spending some amount on luxuries with checking with the other and try to allocate a night to spend some quality time together and any other day where there could be only you too – is a good example of agreement in a co-leading marriage.
6. What all has to be remembered that Co-leading is Co-Growing.
Not only plants which do not grow die, there are humans also, if they do not grow in their relationship, they die. What ultimately leads to making a relationship die is a loss of passion and desire. When there will be no excitement, then you daily mundane and stale routine make your relationship weak and not worthy. Humans are full of needs which have to be fulfilled time to time in a way or the other. So what best will work for a relation is to grow together, keeping each other’s perspective in mind.
Gone are the days where the gender roles have been predefined and both partners are bound to perform those limited roles unwillingly. Today’s couples have clearly understood that there are a lot of opportunities available for them to take their life in the desired direction. What is required is simply to sit down and talk how they want to frame their marriage. Their marriage should not be similar to anyone else, it should be unique and based on their wishes
The future of marriage is not dependent on the default ways/ things which used to be in the past but is on how it creates and anticipates life. You just have to remember these tips while designing you marriage life and surely you will enjoy this important journey of your life.